Dark Lords' Inflation in Diagon Alley
by DrSB
Summary: Ron:“It's magic, Wade! You can't fight magic with science!” Wade: ”I can, too”. So, how much is possible to write a crossover of Kim Possible with Harry Potter? Of course, if you remember how many Would-be Evil Overlords are in "Kim Possible"...


"_Accio Naco!_"

- Ron Stoppable's very first spell.

Ron: "_It's magic, Wade! You can't fight magic with science!_"  
Wade: "_I can, too_".  
Ron: "_No, you can't_".  
Wade: "_Can, too!_"  
Ron: "_Cannot!_"  
Wade: "_Can, too!_"  
Ron: "_Cannot!_"  
Wade: "_Can, too!!_"  
Ron: "_Cannot!!!_"  
Wade: "_Can, too - infinity_".  
Ron: "_Oh, he got me with the infinity clause!_"

- Ron and Wade on _Science and magic_, in "_The Full Monkey_".

"_Any sufficiently weird science is undistinguishable from magic_".

- Anonymous' Corollary on Clarke's Laws

_**"A Possible Potter Crossover"**_

i. e.

**"Dark Lords' Inflation in Diagon Alley" **

or

**"No Need for Voldemort!"**

A _crossover _between the tv series "_Kim Possible_" and the series of books "_Harry Potter_".

KP does not meet HP.  
And Ron doesn't meet Ron.  
Since this is not in the book. However Team Possible meets almost every other one.

You have an idea of the number of Evil Overlords in "Kim Possible" ?

*_smile_*

Is there magic in "Kim Possible"?

Yep.

*_blink_*

It is very possible to sketch a scenario!

_Some remarks_: seventh book of Harry Potter, and no meeting of HP and KP to avoid an overflow.

Here we try to explain why, towards the end of the book, the powerful Lord Voldemort seems become totally stupid. All right, to split the soul in seven parts is no good for the brain. But there is something else!

Kim Possible? Fourth season, after "Stop Team Go" but before the final episode, about. Prof. Dementor is still free or has already escaped... now it is irrelevant.

(For the _aficionados_ of Lord Monkey Fist: he is not present. Lord Monkey Fist is still stoned and, you know, we have _already_ in this tale an evil English Lord with an animal fetish and anagram name!)

So, go on!

* * *

_Copyright Note_: "_Kim Possible_" and relative characters are a trademark of the _Disney Production_, "_Harry Potter_" belongs to J.K. Rowling. This work is a mere divertissement.

_

* * *

_

_Chapter 1._

Where, Investigating a Series of Accidents in England, and a Correlated Combination of Electromagnetic Anomalies, Wade (on Screen!), Kim and Ron Find the Magical Mystery World of Harry Potter and Are Able to Pass Themselves Off as American Wizardry Students in Visit at Hogwarts - Dr. Drakken's Holidays in Scotland

_Chapter 2._

Terrible and Suspiciously Poor Figures of Kim and Ron in Various and Different Magical Arts - Kim and Ron Decode a Book of Arithmancy and Carry It Through.  
Ron's Very Long Night:  
Arithmancy + Modern Maths = KA*BOOOOM !!! Booyah!  
Usefulness of a Pseudo-Living Cybersuit for Arithmantic Spells - Hogwarts and Computer Graphics: the Hell of Geometric Transformations and Altered Palettes - Talks and Chatters on Magic, American Style

_Chapter 3._

Picking a House: Kim Possible's Obvious Sorting! A Very Long Sorting for Ron: Hufflepuff? Slytherin??? An Eccentric Gryffindor - How to Bypass Magical Jamming: Wade and Binary Magic. Lesson of Dark Arts: Alecto Takes a False Step - Zorpox the Conqueror, the Dark Overlord: Organ Music - Terror and Embarrassment at Hogwarts: Severus Snape's Providential Intervention

_Chapter 4._

Prof. Dementor's Astounding Discovery: Cold Evil Aliens Are Among Us! - Hogwarts: Stoppable's Unusual Allergy to Dark Arts - Naked Mole Rats and Other Familiars - Rufus, Rubeus Hagrid and Imaginary Giants

_Chapter 5._

Ron's Awkward Self-Transfiguration Mistake: And Now Ron Is Another Kim. Again - Opinion of Four Bullies on Strip-Teasing by Imperius Curse as a Very Amusing Idea - And It Is Not - When You Pick a Wrong Kim - The Terror Is Back: Infernal Screensaver - The Dark Ron and Kim: An Evil Marriage Proposal - Bloody Baron's Cheers and Applauses - Back to Normal

_Chapter 6._

Dr. Drakken's Big Discovery: the Pan-Dimensional Vortex Inducer and the Magic - Shego Skeptical - Shego Changes Her Mind - Neutralizing Magic and Reality by Using the PDVI - Genetics and Magics: Dr. Drakken's New Illegal Operations

_Chapter 7._

In the Headmaster's Office - Legilimens and Zapping: Practical Illegibleness of Stoppable's Mind - Ron and Severus Snape: Tales of Losing Pants and of Girlfriends - Unmasked? Magic Acceptors and Holes: Kim and the Anti-Magic of the Cybersuit - Away From Hogwarts!

_Chapter 8._

Green Witch, Blue Wizard - Magic People Abducted by Flying Saucers - Scepticism on the Muggleness of the Aforesaid Contrivances - Odd Gossips: "Is the Dark Lord Gone Crazy?" - "Lather, Rinse and Obey": Snape and Drakken's Shampoo

_Chapter 9._

Kim and Ron: the Search for Voldemort - Voldemort Found - An Incautious Imperius Curse - Lord Voldemort vs. Zorpox the Conqueror! Yes, Again - Magidifferential Calculus, Quantum Mech and Mystical Monkey Power against Dark Arts - An Ungrateful Voldemort is Saved in Extremis and an Odd Couple of Teenagers (with a Naked Mole Rat) Run Away Through the Ceiling

_Chapter 10._

Kim and Ron Meet Shego and Drakken - Magical Cookies - Here Comes Prof. Dementor, the Great Evil Overlord: Artificial Lightnings - Abduction of Dementors - Lord Voldemort's Nerves.

_Chapter 11._

"But does not the Dark Lord do really anything for this?" "But how many Dark Lords are there?" "Mom, I want to be a Dark Lord, too!" and Other Chatters - Unpleasant Attitude of Most Wizards to Obey Every Dark Lord They Meet - A Legend From the Confusion: the Archwizard Darker than Voldemort and His Beautiful Partner: but is she Green or Red? - Lord Voldemort's First Nervous Breakdown

_Chapter 12. Dementor and More Dementors  
_

Potterwatch - Grasping Better the Situation - Enormous Electromagnetic Interferences Can Ruin Communications and Spells - Prof. Dementor Still Capturing and Cloning Dementors - Prof. Dementor's Big Problem: Finding A Sound Name for the "Creatures" - In a Fit of Madness Voldemort Declares Himself Invincible: Severus Snape's Sedative Potions

_Chapter 13._

Lord Voldemort's Confession: "Zorpox the Conqueror, Doctor Drakken, Professor Dementor and also this guy that names himself Killigan the Dark Golfer! And now, people are speaking of this Lord Vader, the Dark Lord of the Sith! Who damn is he? And what is happening to anyone? Was not sufficient that Harry Potter to pester ruinously?" - In the meanwhile, at the Gringott...

_Chapter 14._

Voldemort Flies to Grindelwald and Claims the Elder Wand - As soon as Voldemort Declares to Be the Dark Lord, immediately Grindelwald Ask Him Laughing Whether by the way He is Dr. Zero or His Name is Zompox or Tevildo - Voldemort Avadakevadras Him but Grindelwald is Already Dead by Loud Laughing.

_Interlude_.  
Dursleys' Hawaii Holiday - The Giant Drill, Uncle Vernon and the Four-Eyed Guy that Defines Himself an "Evil Genius"

_Chapter 15._

While Potter and Voldemort are Fighting at Hogwarts, it Happens Also in London a Four-Parts Battle - Kim and Ron (and Some Phoenix Guy) Against Residual Deatheaters Against Wizards Hypnotized by Dr. Drakken and His PDVI Against the "Creatures" of prof. Dementor and his Generator of GigaEMP - Chaos! Diagon Alley Upside Down - _Id est_ Dagon Alley, Vertical Alley and Oblong Alley - "An American Jewish Ninja in London" - Sixty-Four Kinds of Magic - Standard Conclusion with Explosions and Flights - Everything Back to Normal (in a Sense).

_Chapter 16. The Other Three Ministers_

Epilogue. Potter and Friends in Triumph - In Downing Street, the Minister of Magic Meets the Minister of Weird Science and Both are to Meet a Third, Mysterious Minister Guy - The Inflation of Dark Lords is Temporarily Removed - New Forms of Ministerial Embarrassment - A Group of Deatheaters is Surprised While They are Sighing before a Shego's Portrait.

... The End?

_Annotations_

* "_Zapping_" is also a slang mode for "Quick Channel Hopping or Surfing"

* _Lord Vader_: what happen if the wizards of Harry Potter's world see walls and walls covered with Muggle posters of the image of Darth Vader, denoted as the Dark Lord, too?

*_ Dr. Zero_ is the Big Bad in "_Ogon Bat_", a _very very old_ superhero Japanese cartoon. Black-hooded guy with a claw hand. The demential evil laugh of Dr. Zero was IMHO the unique motivation to see the show

* _Zompox _is Zo_r_pox: Grindelwald heard something, inaccurately but he heard something

* _Tevildo _was a first version of Sauron and Morgoth's cat in the first version of Luthien and Beren's tale by Tolkien

* At the end, Professor Dementor found a "good" name for the "aliens": a very long polysyllabic Greek-Latin word. When wizards called them _Dementors_, he was REALLY disappointed.

* * *

_With Best Regards  
_

_Dr. S._

_  
too busy to perpetrate a fanfic, _

_... but free enough to scheme it._


End file.
